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Confidence is rarely something we are simply born with. For Sheila Gabriella, it has been shaped by personal challenges, years of self-discovery and the courage to question the expectations of others. From overcoming bullying and self-doubt to representing Nevada at Miss Grand USA and founding a tennis academy, her journey has brought together resilience, ambition and a passion for personal growth. Now, as she explores the subjects of identity, influence and personal power through her writing, Sheila continues to discover new ways to encourage women to believe in their own potential.
1. Sheila, if someone met you only through pageantry, they might never guess how much of your story began with overcoming bullying and low self-esteem. What would you want them to know about the person behind the confidence they see today?
I would want them to know that the confidence they see today was built gradually. Confidence doesn’t mean I’m never scared, anxious, doubtful or hesitant — I still experience all of those feelings. The difference is that now, I can feel them and continue moving toward the things I believe in anyway. I’ve learned that confidence is more than a feeling; it’s a belief in yourself that becomes stronger through action.
2. Looking back at the girl you were then and the woman you are now, what changed first — the way you saw yourself, or the way you allowed other people to see you?
Definitely the way I saw myself. I had to learn not to place so much weight on how other people perceived me, whether their perception was positive or negative. I had to give myself permission to become the woman of my dreams, even if that made other people uncomfortable.
I also had to learn that my worth doesn’t disappear when I make a bad decision or get something wrong. I can hold myself accountable, learn from my choices and still believe I’m worthy of great things. That shift changed the way I moved through the world.
3. That experience has now found its way into a book you’re writing. Was there one particular idea you knew had to be on those pages from the very beginning?
One of the most groundbreaking lessons for me was learning not to take other people’s actions so personally. That realization changed my life and had a huge impact on my confidence.
It’s so easy to internalize rejection, disappointment or someone else’s behavior and turn it into a statement about our own worth. I knew I wanted to write something that could help women free themselves from the mindsets that quietly work against them, so they can pursue what they truly want without constantly questioning whether they deserve it.
4. People often talk about confidence as something you either have or don’t. Having had to build yours, what do you think people misunderstand most about becoming truly confident?
I think people misunderstand that confidence is much bigger than a feeling. It’s a mindset, a belief system and something that requires action to make it real.
You don’t have to feel like the most confident person in the room to make a confident decision. At the same time, you can genuinely believe in yourself and still make a decision out of fear. We’re human.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is not to wait until you feel confident to start working toward your dreams. Sometimes the action has to come first, and the confidence catches up later.
5. You’ve experienced pageantry from inside the competition, including representing Nevada at Miss Grand USA. What has surprised you most about that world once you became part of it yourself?
What surprised me most is how much strategy actually goes into doing well in pageantry. No two pageant systems are exactly the same.
Each has its own energy, style and expectations, and understanding those differences can make a real impact on how you connect with the judges and audience.
There’s obviously beauty and glamour involved, but behind that is preparation, adaptability and strategy. I think the competitive and strategic side of pageantry is actually part of what keeps me interested in it.
6. Between pageantry and founding a tennis academy, you’ve chosen two worlds that both demand discipline and the ability to perform under pressure. Do you recognise the same side of yourself in both?
Absolutely. I started playing competitive tennis at seven years old, and I think growing up in that environment gave me a level of comfort in situations that involve pressure and require strategic thinking.
Tennis taught me very early that you can prepare as much as possible, but once you step onto the court, you still have to adapt in real time. I recognize that same part of myself in pageantry. I enjoy preparing, competing, strategizing and figuring out how to perform well when the outcome isn’t guaranteed.
7. There are several projects coming up for you. Which one feels impossible to keep quiet about right now, and what can you tell us about it?
Oh, this is tough because I’m excited about several things! But one project I’m especially excited about is a book I’m writing centered around the life of Cleopatra and what women today can learn from her.
I’m exploring how we can take some of the strategies she used around influence, identity, personal power and navigating the world around her and apply those ideas to modern life. At its core, the book is about encouraging women to show up in their own lives more confidently, boldly and strategically — not by becoming someone else, but by becoming more intentional about who they already are.
